| *For almost a decade I have been hosting women's | | | | in all her bounty and nourishing qualities, but either |
| weekend retreats that focus on opening up to the | | | | consciously or unconsciously choose to disregard her |
| miraculous within the ordinary. These retreats are full | | | | harshness. |
| of discovery and wonder for all involved. The space | | | | Just as one prepares themselves to be in the wild, |
| created works like a greenhouse for the participant's | | | | by learning the land, its creatures and their habits and, |
| tender shoots of awareness to spring into blossom, | | | | most importantly, by being intensely alert, one must |
| in a safe environment free from judgment, obligation | | | | also prepare themselves for life's journey through the |
| and criticism. | | | | wilds of their own inner nature. To naively believe |
| Between the nervous, timid, even reluctant manner | | | | that by being nice and good one can properly |
| of the women during first hours and the bright, open, | | | | negotiate the vulnerability of being in a physical body |
| laughing beings that depart two days later, many | | | | is an invitation to be challenged and tested. We shut |
| obstacles have been tackled, resistance melted, | | | | out the 'nasty bits' at our own peril. |
| discoveries made, laughter shared, tears shed, songs | | | | To be fair, it has been culturally ingrained for women |
| sung and truth revealed. | | | | to exhibit all the so-called positive aspects of the |
| Connection to the source of power as well as to the | | | | feminine, and suppress the warrior aspects of her |
| divine occurs through the body. Over the years that | | | | nature. In order to survive, many of us have become |
| I have been on this path of personal growth and | | | | innocuous, servile, compromising. What happens is |
| self-awareness, the biggest 'ah ha's have come | | | | that these other facets of ourselves are jumping to |
| through taking the body past the mind. In other | | | | be released and they show themselves only by |
| words, engaging the body through breath, voice, | | | | squeezing out in bitchiness, whining, temper tantrums, |
| shaking, dance, yoga and drumming, so that the | | | | and cattiness. Once we know these shadow sides of |
| conscious mind is engaged in the activity and relaxes | | | | our nature, and come to appreciate their value, we |
| enough to allow what lies beneath to surface. In | | | | can begin to truly integrate them into the full |
| these practices, one cannot be lukewarm; one must | | | | spectrum of our potential. |
| be total, then authentic and often buried feelings can | | | | We have such tremendous capacity to live a life rich |
| emerge. | | | | with experience and expression, yet most of us live |
| This understanding has come from my own direct | | | | within such a narrow range. The good news is |
| experience. My desire is to provide the protected | | | | through all of the work done in the past hundred |
| environment needed for participants who are | | | | years, to wake us up individually and collectively, we |
| courageous enough to enter their own interior realms | | | | are more aware and stronger now. Many of us have |
| through engaging the body. I say courageous, | | | | built up what one of my friends refers to as |
| because it is a journey of circling back again and | | | | 'emotional muscle,' the stamina to hold our own |
| again to those places of pain and rage sealed up too | | | | emotions, feelings and most importantly, power. Not |
| quickly. We move, sing, breathe, drum and shout to | | | | power over anyone or thing, but the power inherent |
| open up those places, expose them to our | | | | in knowing ourselves and acting from consciousness |
| consciousness, and free ourselves from the effort | | | | and clarity. This is being in your power. That is being |
| and strain of holding them at bay. The body, which | | | | fully alive. |
| cannot lie, informs the mind, which has protective | | | | When we have full contact with all of who we are, |
| mechanisms that have often outlived their usefulness. | | | | we can meet the divine without shame or artifice. |
| This work involves knowing all parts of ourselves, | | | | Retreat work and activities |
| even those that are uncomfortable, or that we may | | | | In the retreats, we do powerful meditations |
| consider unacceptable. In knowing and accepting | | | | developed by Osho, an enlightened mystic whose |
| these parts, they cease to have power over us: the | | | | ashram is in Poona, India. Esana, my yoga instructor |
| power that makes us act reactively, unconsciously or | | | | and co-facilitator, warms us up and deepens our |
| against our better judgment. In order for women to | | | | body awareness and knowledge through Kripalu yoga. |
| reclaim their power, they must know intimately what | | | | We dance, sound, and breathe to break through |
| has disempowered them, cut them off from their | | | | barriers that keep us from experiencing our full |
| source. | | | | aliveness. |
| Even though we have discarded words like | | | | This work has been my liberator and it is my passion. |
| 'unladylike,' the recoil from that sort of behaviour | | | | It is for those willing to be courageous; those who |
| remains. The majority of women aim to be 'nice' at all | | | | sincerely desire to know themselves, hence to know |
| times, fair, just, kind and so on. We can also be | | | | the divine/spirit/God/Creator, and who wish to exist |
| ravenous, wily, cunning and driven. It is interesting to | | | | here on this earth to their full capacity as a woman |
| note how willing we are to align ourselves with nature | | | | and as a human being. |